Short jokes
What is an orphan's favorite quote in Star Wars?
"I am your father."
What do you call emos that live in the Bahamas?
Tropical depressions.
Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.
My dad still hasn’t come back with the milk. Now we are stuck eating dry cereal.
Your mom is so ugly. When she goes to the dentist, they make her face down.
Someone asked me my gender... I said, "Woah, man."
Where was Moses when the lights went out? - In the dark!
What instrument do a pair of sheep play? The two-baaaa.
After watching Star Wars 8, I have to say Snoke was half the man I expected him to be.
What did the Queen Bee say to the other bees? "Beehive yourselves!"
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
What do you call dynamite on steroids? - High Explosive.
Why do some men call their testicles "bells"? Because it's next to their "ding-dong."
Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimers? Yeah, neither have they.
My girlfriend is a porn star. -- She will kill me if she finds out.
The optimist thinks the glass is half full. The pessimist thinks the glass is half empty. The feminist thinks the glass is raping them.
I wasn’t understanding what I had to do for homework, so my teacher said, “Let me break it down for you like the Twin Towers.”
You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.
your mom
What's the difference between calling someone dad or daddy? How you come from his balls.