Short jokes

Short jokes

Titanic

Captain of the Titanic: “Where’s all that f***ing water coming from?”

Iceberg

"Watch out, there's an iceberg!"

Other person: "We will be fine."

10 minutes later, drowns, says, "We will be fine."

Wife

Why did the Mexican man throw his wife out of the window...

Ta kill her.

Butt

How do we get a butt? God made us like that, and we can't change it. If you wanted to, you have to die <:

Butt

What did the butt say to the other butt? "I got big fat apples for butt checks!"

Name

What did I say to my friend, "Job, your new name is Jojo Siva?"

Code

Secret code that Bin Laden sent to Obama but couldn't decipher!

It was eloHssA OllEH!!

Clown

Me: I'ma sign up to be a clown.

My friend: Why?

Me: Because my life is a joke. 😂

Banana

Q: Why did the boy not eat the banana?

A: He was scared the juice might come out.

Mama

Yo Mama so fat, she has a Twinkie inside of a Twinkie inside of her fat ass motherfucking belly button!

Kid

My kids [are] so damn bad[.] We took them to Disney in Florida. They paid me not to bring them back ever.

Milkman

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Milk man.

Milkman who?

Milk poooooooooooooooop peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep man!

Difference

What's the difference between a square peg in a round hole and a kilo of lard?

One's a good lot of fat; the other's a fat lot of good.