Short jokes

How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?

Are you 7/11 or 9/11?

My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.

Did you hear about the guy who got fired for having sex with his clients?

He was a great veterinarian.

A scarecrow got promoted because he was outstanding in his field.

Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.

BTW, I am one, wahahaa!

Rizz

Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.

Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.

My thighs have a different texture pack than the rest of me.

I called a Suicide Helpline, but they didn't help me commit suicide.

Tbh they really left me hanging there.

I'm so depressed that when I smile, my Face ID doesn't recognize me.

Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?

A: The size of balls they play with.

I banged a German chick one time. I tried anal and asked her to rate the experience. She kept yelling "9! 9! 9!"

I'd tell a necrophilia joke, but they've been done to death.

You know the difference between me and a zebra? Me neither.

What do you call a crowd of horny white women?

A field of cotton waiting to be picked.

What are three things you can't give a black guy?

A fat lip, a black eye, and a job.

Why did Adele cross the road?

To say hello on the other side.

Roses are red, your cities are gone, I am Thomas the thermonuclear bomb.

Question: Why did Donald Trump convert to Judaism?

Answer: Because he heard that Vladimir Putin likes to drink vodka with "Orange Jews"!

I don't struggle with depression, I'm used to it.

Woman: "I want coffee, black."

Cop: *takes out gun* "WHERE?!"