Short jokes
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear.
Why did the boy throw the clock out the window?
He wanted to see time fly.
What do you call an Afghan in the bath? A bath bomb.
There was always that one specific person you thought ruined your life, but it turns out your life has always been ruined by you being in it.
Why don't phones wear glasses? Because they have contacts!
What was the one word that could have saved Princess Diana's life?
Taxi.
Why was baptism invented?
How else was a priest supposed to clean his sex toys?
Autistic jokes have been very popular recently. In other words, I've been very popular recently.
You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!
Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.
I asked my friend if he would take a bullet for the last person he slept with.
He said hell yeah, I'd do anything for my sister!
How did the Shaggy defense become successful for JD Vance?
He was not banging on the sofa. Rather, he was banging the sofa!
Women: “Men used to go to war, now they go to clubs.”
Men: “Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked, now it’s $3.99.”
Ever wondered why Chinese kids don’t believe in Santa?
They made the toys.
Why don't you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it.
My wife left me for an Indian guy. I know he's going to treat her well, I heard they worship cows.
I've been hit by several things in my life.
Sadly, never a car.
On September 11th, 2001, the New York Giants lost against the Jets.
Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.
BTW, I am one, wahahaa!
Rizz
Are you a basketball hoop? 'Cause I want to put my balls in you.
Are you a photo biographer? 'Cause I can picture us together.
When you feel lonely, just watch a scary movie.
You won't feel lonely anymore :(