Short jokes
Hey D.K., how are you? :)
Love you!
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback!
A book went to the doctor’s office and said: “Doctor, doctor, I’ve got thesaurus throat ever.”
In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.
And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"
Why is your mom ugly, bozo?
An orphan made an Instagram. He did not know what that symbol was on the bottom left hand corner.
Cruel and unusual punishment.
If you got a crush and you are a 👧🏻 girl, let him lick 👅 your vagina.
A wife asks her husband: Am I pretty or ugly?
The husband answers her: Pretty.
The wife responds: Thank yo-
The husband interrupts her: Pretty ugly!
My life.
Kill me, please.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
Your mum is so fat, she needs 3 different watches for 3 different time zones.
What do you call a circus show? A school shooter.
You're so fat, you went on a scale and it said, "One at a time."
My girlfriend didn't bring me the sandwich, so I brought the gas.
Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.