Short jokes
You want to hear a cheesy pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy!
Hehehehehe.
A rich man paid for a trip to space, but he couldn't go because the rocket was damaged. He received a refund and an apology.
For his sake, I hope that heaven is wheelchair accessible...
What is the best thing about gay people?
They're gay about being gay even though they're gonna get shot in the USA. Wait, that rhymes!
Did you know that whenever I read my blood donor ID?
Because it says "B Positive!"
Hey updog!
What's updog?
(Laughter)
Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"
Orphan; "Stop calling here!"
If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
What do cows like to do?
Cow-culating!
Why do vampires drink blood?
Because they can't drink Bloody Marys because they are vampires.
Test.
I went shopping, and then to the hospital, and then to bed, and then I promised to only say "and" once in a sentence.
Capitalism.
Your mom shat you out after having Taco Bell. That’s why she calls you a little shat.
What did Santa use as a candy cane?
Wait, wait, I said it wrong.
Okay.
What did Santa use to do his garden...never mind.
People with wheelchairs listen to "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele.
Why did the Unicorns become extinct?
Because unicorns are gay! :|
Hey, stinks, you know why? 'Cause your butts dry!
@shelby denver is a massive nonce.
What do you call a skeleton's egg?
An egg-i-BONE!