If I had a loonie for every degree I have, I wouldn't have a loonie.
Short Jokes
It's a very smart day today. I'd say it has about 30-45 degrees, with humidex.
If I get an atom, I would split it with you.
What did the mincrater do when his Xbox turns off?
He raged! 😱
How did they know the teacher onboard the spaceship had dandruff?
Cause her Head and Shoulders were everywhere!
Why was I angry on my plane? Because I read these stupid 9/11 jokes.
One word. Creeper.
How are the faster readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they read 80 stories in 10 seconds.
What did the expired butter do once it had expired?
It did an expire.
Why did the egg fall off the motorbike?
He was shite.
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
If I worked for Edexcel, I'd give Caroline Flack an A* for her physics experiment.
Dude, ABC, what comes next?
Kid: A big fat noob.
What is an orange?
World's only not rhyming thing. Hehhhehehehehhe.
What did the airplane say to the tower? Allahu Akbar!
Ha ha ha, kya bath hai.
I dropped my phone, but it’s on airplane mode.
New.
What? A telephone? Nah, I'm using a telebone.