Cleanliness jokes
A: What's the difference between a toilet and a washing basin?
B: I don't know.
A: Then I guess your house looks beautiful...
B: ...
What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?
The cheetah became spotless!
What time do babies get dirty?
Playtime.
Foxy the fox was a careless fox. She didn't care about her friend Froggy.
Froggy was a careful frog. One day, Froggy decided to teach the fox a lesson.
Foxy was in her bed sleeping when Froggy made her room an entire mess. She got up, and then her mother berated her for not cleaning her room. From now on, she is a careful fox.
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
What's long, hard, and slimy?
A bar of soap.
There are 4 billion women on earth. Why isn't it clean yet?
I have had an obsession with soap. Don’t worry, I am all clean now!
Why did the rapper take a shower before the concert?
To WASH AWAY the haters!
Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.
Yo mama so disgusting, she hangs toilet paper to dry after she wiped with them.
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
You smell like a monkey, and you might have to take a shower, pu.
What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
One's got hope in her soul, the other's got soap in her hole.
If you get out of the shower clean, how does your towel get dirty?
Bring a knife into the shower. NEVER gonna see that coming! He pulls the curtain like ‘re re‘ and you're like ‘re re’ yourself, motherfucker, and stab him right in the eye! You thought the psycho was out there? SURPRISE, the psycho’s IN HERE with the Irish Spring on them!
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
A bath bomb.
My ex was so full of shit, she probably poured toilet cleaner in her nose to get relief.