Short jokes
These are some of the greatest names ever: Dixie Normous, Dixie Rekt, Ka Monmi, Ice Wallow Kum, Dick Sinsider, Anita Biggerman.
God said, "Let there be light," and it was lit!
Stroke victims are my heroes.
My favorite is Louis C.K.
Yo mama so fat, that when she gets in a monster truck, it becomes a low-rider!
What bumps up and down at 100km an hour?
A baby tied to the back of a speeding truck.
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
I’ve never had Indonesian food. Huh...
Neither have they.(:
Yo mama so hairy, when the baby came out, the baby died because of carpet burning!
Knock knock. Who's there? You... You who? You smell like shit!
What do you call a fish with no legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Break!
Imperial Pilot: What do you think about the new Tie fighter?
Palpatine: Flew it.
The only hood I like is pointy and white.
That's why I can't trust people when I don't see their face at night.
Everyone is talking about Head and Shoulders, and that if he never had a shower, his batteries would have got wet.
Guess what Sally got for Christmas? Gloves! Jk, she still hasn't opened it.
Bully: You are a piece of shit.
Person: No, I'm not a piece, and I'm not brown... so no, honey.
You know the song "Getting Drunk on a Plane"? It was written by the pilot of the Lingard Skinner pilot.
What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?
A sad news story.
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
If Stephen Hawking is ill, does he go to the doctors or Currys PC World?