Short jokes
You know the song "Getting Drunk on a Plane"? It was written by the pilot of the Lingard Skinner pilot.
What’s the best math equation to eat?
Cosine Law.
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
If cops are called pigs, then security guards are piglets.
Me and my twin when we share a pizza: there can be only one!
Why can't orphans tell jokes?
They have no one to tell them to, people.
I'm glad.
I don't know.
Kaas.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bum.
Bum who?
Bum holding a pistol!
My sister said that if you go to a random person's door, the sister will all Waze open it.
How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.
Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?
Friend: Ooo, I see Jessica.
Me: Nice.
Friend: She got some red on her shirt.
Me: Yeah, that's where the Titanic hit her :///
tbh, I was not even talking to you guys. I was talking to the funny jokes about Ariana, and people were saying she was adopted, so, tbh, fuck off!
What happens when someone shoots the Hulk?
He got gangryeen.
Gangrene+green+angry
It says in the Bible to only think about what’s pure and lovely... So I’ve been thinking about you all day long.
What does General Grievous say after he gets his penis growth pills?
A fine addition to my erection.
Your hairline is so far back dinosaurs are seeing it.
I hate you, Gwen. You are a stupid idiot!