Short jokes
The exam is knocking at my door... so I ran away from the window.
Here's a joke... you.
I met him once, but he wouldn’t give me his autograph!
How were Stephen Hawking's best mates, Siri and Google?
Why were Adam and Eve's sons so much alike? Because Cain was Abel minded!
I don’t have enough money to buy cheese, could you provolone me some money?
What did Goodlife Fitness say to LA Fitness? "I guess it's just not 'working out'!"
2+2=4-1=3 quick math.
I can see your cameltoe, you nasty thot!
You give some people 2.54 centimeters, and they take 1.6 kilometers.
What do you call a guy with a bald head who loves to eat biscuits, raisins, and caster sugar?
Gary Baldy (Garibaldi)!
What games do you play if you are bored?
Board games.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand? It was two tired...
Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was outstanding in his field!
If I had a dollar for every time someone did something stupid,
I would have approximately 7.8 Billion dollars.
When someone pops up in your life making you all happy, you be like, "Who sent you?"
What did the baritone say to the alto?
Nothing, you couldn’t hear him.
"You're the bomb"—a compliment in the USA.
An argument in the Middle East.
What's small, stupid, and has no dad?
Ben.
I killed a Wood elf yesterday. The guard charged me with... mer-der.