Short jokes
I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.
Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"
Why did the Asian parents have an Asian baby?
Two wongs don't make a white.
Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.
Why did Sally die? She got stabbed by her mum.
Warning: If you're planning to look here for jokes about the FOOD nuts, don't bother. It's filled with penis jokes.
What's the difference between a child and a carrot? About 140 calories.
Talk to me if you are online.
"My name must taste good; it's always in your mouth."
My cousin called me ugly.
Well, I'm pretty sure 90% of her looks could be wiped away with a Kleenex.
Emo
How to trick a gay man into having sex with a woman?
Take a dump on her vagina!
What do you call a Muslim in America being pursued by a perv?
Alien vs. Predator.
So imagine bullying an orphan so bad they cry, and then you say, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"
Why did the cops come over?
Because parents had kids in their basement.
There is one difference between autistic kids and vegetarians.
They're both vegetables in serotonin ways.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because his parents couldn’t help him out!
What did the bank say to the person?
Bank you very much.
When a kid says, "I'm a pedophile," it means that he has a crush on one of his classmates.
When an adult says it, he is accused as a rapper.
Help me...
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