Short jokes
Why did the terrorist not go undercover?
Because he blew it!
I saw some terrorists on Family Feud. It looked like they had three strikes!
Kindly yeet someone!
Waarom staat de toren van Pisa scheef?
Hij had betere reflexen dan de Twin Towers.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ligma.
Ligma who?
Ligma balls.
Roddy Rick Dalby
Two lepers meet on the street.
First says "How are you doing?"
Second says "Mustn't crumble!"
Why are bees' hair sticky?
Because they use honeycombs!
If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
I always wonder what girls are thinking about. Maybe balls.
When the police saw your hairline, they gave your barber a breathalyzer test.
You're so fat that when you go on a walk with your friends, it looks like they are orbiting you.
"Chairing is caring, folks!"
Violence breeds violence, nothing else.
I would make a joke about America... However, the fact it exists is a joke in itself.
Why do emos love jumping in water?
Because it involves a rope.
I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!
I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!
Why is death taken so lightly?
Because you can take it so quickly.
My friend is an emo. I asked why he wears black. He said, "Black like my soul." I just walked away.