Short jokes

Short jokes

Tool

Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!

Fruit, vegetables, my arms.

Morgue

Mom: “Guess where I’m taking you, son!”

Son: “To the playground?”

Mom: “No, to the morgue.”

Difference

What's the difference between me and the rest of America?

I love one and hate the other.

Guy

Hello guys. It's me, Donald fuckin' Trump. Ask me anything in the comments, guys.

Cop

I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).

Skeleton

Why did the skeleton die from laughter?

'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"

Car

Why was Elon Musk unable to land a job as a television host at NBC?

His own car cannot catch up with Jay Leno's Corvette!

Mum

When God said, "Let there be light," He saw your mum and said, "Let there be dark."

People

How many Polish people does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But you need 5000 Soviet troops in case he goes on strike!