Short jokes
I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.
It’s almost take her to Spirit Halloween, and then rail her in a spooky mask season.
"I'm going to sue Disney. Not enough racism!" - Grizzy
Your mum is a baby, huh? Not a little baby!
There’s no “I” in team, but there is a “U” in cunt.
Russia is worse than the USSR.
Russia is just a bonerless USSR.
The British Society of Psychics' annual convention had to be cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances!
What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?
If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.
What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?
Ground beef.
From now on, we’re gonna call shitting the bed an “Amber Alert.”
What do you call someone who has sex with foals, calves, and lambs? A Quadrupedophile.
Mommy, mommy! Are we outlaws? Your stepmom thinks so.
I can't walk, I can't talk, but I can drive a wheelchair.
For sale: Wheelchair, one careful owner, no longer needed.
If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.
There were ten in the bed and the little one said... "Roll over..."
Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
If Carlsberg did wheelchairs...
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."