Short jokes
What do you call a talentless Korean person? Us Lee Less!
Burn witches and stone whores.
I want to be a bag so we can be together.
Why should you shoot a homeless crackhead in the head?
Because they're basically zombies.
What is the Twilight series about?
A girl's choice between necrophilia and bestiality.
What do Donald Trump and a dick have in common?
Liberals can't keep either one out of their mouths.
The only thing the orphan learned from his dad is the hide-and-seek skill to hide for 18 years. He tried it out; now he has infinite milk.
The quiet kid, orphan, and school shooter walked into a bar, and he ordered a beer.
What do atoms and parents have in common to orphans? You can't see either of them.
What’s a necrophiliac’s safe word? I’m alive.
What's a fat Mexican woman's favorite movie? Tortanic.
I don't ignore dwarfs, I just overlook them.
So apparently, Kurt Cobain's death was mind-blowing.
So the other day I saw a homeless man. He tried to mug me. I let him.
I had nothing on me either. (I'm on the next block over.)
Roses are tree.
I shoved a battery up my butt.
Loona from Helluva Boss is a retarded mutt.
According to the Police report, what did one traffic signal say to the other?
"Roxanne, you don't have to put on the red light..."
I went to a handicapped comedy club, but all the jokes they told were special, and they didn't know a lot about stand-up at all.
What's the worst part about eating vegetables from the hospital?
The life support cord.
I had a teacher named Mr. Stubs. I asked why he was given that name, and he replied, "My parents said my limbs were spare parts."
Roses are red,
Lilies are white,
One race ends up dead
And the other ends up bright.