Short jokes
Why did the strawberry cry? -- Because his mother was in a jam.
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!
Today my stoner friend used my to-do list as a blunt wrap.
He was high on my list of priorities.
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile, and a homosexual walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
This isn't a joke, but I'm a survivor and use humor to cope. I find these extremely funny, so please leave the people writing these alone 😭
Stop with the blind jokes... I don't see the point.
How does the man on the moon cut his hair?
Eclipses it!
Fortnite is like America... At one time it was good and free. Now it's neither.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
I started beating my washing machine because it wasn't working, my wife started crying.
What is the difference between R Kelly and Kelly Clarkson?
R Kelly hits on preteens, Kelly Clarkson hits on toddlers.
What kind of chocolate does a lesbian hate?
Ones that contain nuts.
It's the season of giving, so I'll be giving up!
My wife asked me to help cure her from sucking her thumb. So I drew a cock on it.
What did the woman on the beach say to Michael Jackson? Hey, get out of my sun!
"Waiter, my steak is too skinny."
"It's a strip steak, sir."
"At these prices, it should not only strip, but sing and dance too!"
What game did Al-Qaeda play with the Twin Towers on September 11th, 2001? Jenga.
Q: What's stronger than family?
A: Whatever tree Paul Walker hit.
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.