Short jokes
What's a rapper's favorite type of CANDY?
Mic Drops.
I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R. Whites in the other. I got into a hot sweat. I think I have Corona Virus.
How do you communicate to the dead?
Jump up and down on the ground and speak in Morse code!
I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.
Who likes Fortnite? Gwen Stacy is in the game, let's goooooo! I love her!
What did one Koala say to the other?
"Help me I'm burning. Aaaugh!!! Oh fuck oh fuck I'm on fire!! AAAAaugh!"
My sister said, "LET'S GO TO PIZZA!" So, I went to the pizza shop with her and she replied, "We really only needed the car?"
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
Lettuce: Tomato, you're doing great!
Tomato: Thanks for the condiment!
Somebody asked Rosa Parks what color the Skittles were, but she answered everything was black and white.
Osama bin Laden
Got like 2,997 kills, damn, that's a new record!
What do you call autistic people with guns? Special forces.
1 like = 1 Ukrainian child sent to Russia.
British tv: 🖥
Italian tv: 📺
I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"
When I finished playing my guitar, I noticed an amputee in the crowd not giving me a round of applause.
You're so fake, Barbie was jealous of you!
My sister asked where is my book.... me: "itti badi nak hai gufa jaisi dhund us mei."
What's the difference between a rabbi and a priest? One cuts them off and one sucks them off.
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