Short jokes
SON: “Mommy, I found Daddy!”
MOM: “What did I tell you about digging in the garden?”
Incest. A game the whole family can play.
Where did Johnny go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
Cannibal (n.) Someone who is fed up with people.
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
People in 1912: "Titanic is unstoppable, even God couldn't sink this ship."
God: "Bet, where are my icebergs?"
After 40 years, Kobe finally learned to pass.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
What did the football coach say when he went to the bank?
-"I want my quarterback."
Man, choking on sugar seems like the sweetest way to die.
What is the Titanic's favorite mint?
Icebreakers.
Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory?
Many soles were lost.
I asked my wife if I could use toys during sex last night. You should've seen her face when I rolled my Hot Wheels across her tits.
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
What do fat demons hate? Exorcise.
When I grow up, I wanna be like Lil Peep... Dead.
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.