Short jokes

Why did my dad leave me and my mum?

I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?

Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.

My brother thinks he's cool when he just SMELLS.

Tazzaro got me like: 😂

Orphans got me like: 😂

Y'know, I never knew Obi-Wan Kenobi participated in an anime, "Snow White with the Red Hair," up until now.

I remember I met an orphan. He asked, "Can I suck your thumb?" I said, "Why?" Because "that'd be pig."

You're so fat, you don't need internet because you're already worldwide.

Roses are red, violets are purple, lay in my bed so I can suck your nurple.

I made this game called Ligma. Say it, "Ligma."

Lick my balls.

Is Google male or female?

Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a fruit joke.

A man and a boy went into a forest. The boy said he was scared. The man said, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone."

Yo mama so stupid that she had an appointment with Dr. Pepper.

"Sike, I lied, your dick is dry."

When the cow goes, "moo," and sheep say, "baaa," and the bull says, "boo!"

Be careful around fire, plastic melts.

A basketball player walks into a strip club:

"Hi, I heard I could bounce some balls here?"

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?

I told this knock knock joke to Helen Keller...

Me: Knock Knock

Her:

Brits don't exist. Mummies can't have kids.