Short jokes
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
Me, holding a baby: "Oh my God, it's so cute!"
Also me: "Throw it."
Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?
Because there was no chemistry...
MY NAME IS JEFFFFFFFF!
I'm dead inside.
My diet:
Make all of my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look...
Corn flake.
What did the Orphan say when he Googled Orphan jokes?
I would say these jokes hit home, but there is no home to hit.
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
How many degreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees does Billy Corgan have?
1979.
What's the difference to a kamikaze and bin Ladin?
Bin Ladin survived when he went into a building. I have aids.
The two biggest dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth," and "I won't come in your mailbox."
What do you call a man shopping? A half-grown carton of cheese.
Imagine being named Colby and you burn yourself.
I called my dog 5 miles.
Today, I fawn over my miles.
How did the toilet react when it received a gift?
That was so pot full (thoughtful)!
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
Hey John, how are you going?
Helium, yeah good, what about you?
(Hey Liam)
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)