Short jokes

You're so poor that homeless people feel sorry for you.

Aitana is so fat that Thanos had to clap for her to disappear.

Your mom said my cum tastes like Captain Crunch, bitch.

You're so fake, Barbie was jealous of you!

I tried to search stuff about 9/11 for a research project, but it didn’t work... I guess the site crashed.

What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?

His hide-and-seek skills.

"2001 just called and they want their towers back."

After you read this post, you will forget you were gay.

Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

I was at the bank yesterday.

A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

What does a pumpkin need when it's hurt? A pumpkin patch.

There's a one-story house. Everything's yellow, even the kitchen, living room, and bedrooms. What color are the stairs?

I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.

When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,

You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"

Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.

Why can't orphans be kidnapped?

Because most kidnappers use a family van.

Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts.

What would you rather be, emo or handicapped?

Trick question, emo is a handicap.

How much you wanna bet you will not repeat my name out loud (at school/work)?