Short jokes

Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.

Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.

He’s got himself.

If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?

History teacher: "They had a temporary cure for the disease, but it would be years before they found a cure for life."

Student: "I need that."

Why do we name hurricanes?

To keep an eye on them.

I walked up to 2 people kissing and stared.

After a little while, they asked me if I minded. I said no, I don’t mind.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock." "Knock, knock who?" "Can you let me in now?"

Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.

I went to a muffler party... it was exhausting!

Wanna hear a skeleton joke?

Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.

What language do they speak in the middle of the earth?

CORE-ean

I've done a skele-TON of work to think of this joke. Trust me, I've got a FEW more jokes!

No, "quarter quarter."

I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"

What do dogs drink? Pupsi.

Why can’t you run in a campground?

Because it’s past tents.

The QUEEN took a shit at the poker table. It was a ROYAL FLUSH.

Hey John, how are you going?

Helium, yeah good, what about you?

(Hey Liam)

What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?

Hot Wheels :)

I would tell you a story of my dad... If I knew who he was.