Short jokes

Short jokes

Woman

What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.

Woman

Why can't women just shut the fuck up! I hate women. They need to know their place and stay in the kitchen and be baby makers...

Rose

Roses are red,

my life is a disaster,

the children are fast,

but the combine is F A S T E R!

Expense

Man: Okay, tell me a joke without the expense of anyone's feelings.

Me: Okay, so an Asian...

Suicide

My mom said, "Don't jump off, we need you."

I said, "No," then I jumped off a building and died.

Orphan

A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."

Screen

Why does Stephen Hawking need some screens?

He needs to win those Fortnite tournaments and get to Champions League.

Word

Obama: It smells like UpNigga in here...

Trump: What's UpNigga?

Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!

Orphan

Why are orphans so sad?

Because every time they swallow, they think... "You should have Mom."

Owner

Q: What do you call an owner that can't take care of their cat? A: A impurrefect owner.