Short jokes

Short jokes

Cancer

So I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back...

Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient.

Surgeon

What's the most difficult thing about being a pediatric surgeon?

Keeping the scalpel steady while masturbating.

Dog

I walk in on my mum and she's in the middle of pulling off my dad's boxers. I said, "Mum, you really spoil those dogs!"

Pussy

My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?

Orphan

Why can't orphans play soccer? Because they can't practice with their dad.

Cannibal

The cannibal says to the other cannibal, "I like it when humans fall from the sky because then they are meateor."

Scent

The cashier kicked me out because when he asked for 99 cents, I gave him 99 scents.

Comedian

These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian, and I know how to BAKE on breakfast.

2 jokes in a row babyyyyy!