Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead!
Short Jokes
What does Donald Trump say when he declares war? Nuke them.
What does a pervert say when he declares war? Nude them.
What does the blind, deaf child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Why do pedophiles never cum first?
Because they like to cum in a little behind.
Why did the disabled kid keep getting bullied?
He couldn’t stand up for himself.
You know how many people said, "This ship will never sink?"
They jinxed it by saying "never sink."
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
I am like currency; people always trade me out for someone better.
What's bald and can't grow no hair?
A kid with cancer.
What type of pizza do they serve on an airplane?
Plane pizza.
If you're a cat person, never let hungry Chinese into your house. They might just have a snack.
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
What's black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white...? A dead nun rolling down a hill.
You don't need a license to drive a sandwich.
What do you call it when you see Chinese people in a gang?
The "Ching Chang Gang."
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
Wanna know something funny?
- Women's rights.
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!
Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you haven't told her twice.