Q. What's the difference between Trump and a Teletubby?
A. The Teletubby is a lot more coherent.
Short Jokes
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by kids.
Iran: We can beat the USA.
Japan: You do realize we beat him in Battleship, and he dropped the sun on us.
Iran: So?
Japan: Twice!
How do you make a baby cry?
You punch it in the face.
What do Indian hip hop artists eat?
Rice rice baby.
There was a blind man. He was blind. Ha, sucks for him.
You're so ugly that when you came out of the haunted house, you had a job offer.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
I usually hang up Halloween decorations,
but this year I'm gonna be the decoration.
When I'm cutting my grass, want to know what it reminds me of? My arms and legs.
Q: How many dogs does it take to shingle a roof? A: It depends on how you cut 'em.
Don’t you just wanna hang around, like Chester?
1: My grandpa died last year.
2: What kind of cancer?
1: He was hit by a bus! It's called bus cancer.
So a mushroom walks in a bar and the waiter says, "You can't be here."
And the mushroom says, "Why? I'm a fungi!"
How do you know a gay guy has been in your house?
There are speedos in the microwave.
Highest level of insult by a girl by seeing a guy's dick:
"I can shit bigger logs than that thing of your's" 🤣
...
What do you call a cutta with ginger hair?
Flinn Taylor.
