Short jokes

Short jokes

Zoo

Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo.

Kid: Why?

Dad: I clean up animal s*** at the zoo.

Eye

Why are you so tired if you can’t see? Because you are blind.

Cow

Why are theaters popular among cows?

They enjoy watching moovies.

Banana

What did the first guy say to the second?

Wanna shove a banana up yo ass?

Sex

Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?

"I'm stronger than you."

Cancer

How does a lady with stage 3 cancer introduce herself?

"Hey y'all, I'm Diane."

Car

What did the car say when it crashed? That's wheely unfortunate!

Jug

She had two gallons of milk, and I was starin' at her jugs.

Fetus

What do a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think?

"Man, my mom's going to kill me!"

Pacman

The gayest person in the world is Pacman. You can pay him to eat 200 balls.

Airplane

Have I told you the joke about the airplane? Ah, forget it, it probably just went over your head.