Short jokes
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be water melon.
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
What takes 10 seconds to go SLPAT! on the ground?
9/11 victim!
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can always count on me.
I would like to call you as dumb as a rock, but they can hold a door open.
Q: What do you call a duck that's sad?
A: Idk, but it's acting really duckpressed.
Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.
Your mum is so fat she sat on Walmart and lowered the prices.
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
My sister thinks she's so smart and funny. The only thing that is funny is her face.
Breaking news (2020): Depressed pigeon misses shitting on people.
The emo kid went for a high five. People say he's still hanging.
My hemorrhoids are so bad, I’ve had toilet bowls that looked like abortions.
*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*
Putin be like that boat is now a submarine!
These jokes are darker than the list of victims dead from cops.
Me: Roasts my annoying cousin.
Everyone at the barbecue...
Me: What is the difference between your mom and a mosquito?
Friend: Let me guess, they both suck you.