Short jokes

Who crashed the plane?

1. Abu Faram? - terrorist

2. The little kid Joseph?

3. The passed out pilot?

Or Jamal?

My sister’s birthday is on 9/11. When she opened her presents, she jumped up with an explosion.

Imagine going up to an emo and saying, "You're just like a spider, you're both good at hanging."

The bully says, "Your mom!" The girl says, "Is sleeping with your dad."

The only thing brighter than my cuteness is the fire on the Twin Towers.

What do you get when you put an ape's brain in a gorilla? A feminist!

Quiet Kid: *reaches into bag*

Teacher: EVERYBODY RUN!

If you are what you eat, then I’m black.

What's the best song to sing to George Floyd?

"I Will Survive," by Gloria Gaynor.

Waluigi gets his Walu-weenie stuck in a vending machine!

I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.

Just to test their patients.

You're old enough to remember when emojis were called "hieroglyphics."

What might an aborted child want for Christmas?

..... a home that isn't a bin.

When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?

When he is on the train.

You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.

Little Johnny was learning about anal sex, when he learned what it was he said, "My uncle just calls this shhhhh..."

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a pregnant emo girl?

The emo girl still bleeds.

Your hairline is so bad man, I gave your doctor a breathalyzer.

After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.

You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.

You're so skinny that if I were to put you on a flagpole, you would wave in the wind.