Short jokes
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
Your mom saw Uranus and never was the same in HD. :)
How to surprise a blind man: put a plunger in the toilet!
Why was the emo mad?
The picture got hung, not her.
I would rather be drugged and robbed by Cardi B than listen to her f***ing music.
Roses are red, violets are blue, When I take out the trash, I remember you.
Women be like, "Don't body shame," then goes to body shame men's heights.
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
I like dildos.
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can always count on me.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
I would like to call you as dumb as a rock, but they can hold a door open.
Q: What do you call a duck that's sad?
A: Idk, but it's acting really duckpressed.
Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.
*Coughs roughly* Oh my God, it hurts so much. I can't see. It burns! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! Help!!! *Weakly*
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
Guess what.
What?
Your mum saw your 1 inch.
By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?
Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.
Enjoy!