Furniture jokes
Something you can say about your furniture, but not your partner: "Those legs sure hold a lot of weight."
Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
What kind of pillow makes sounds?
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
What did the booty say to the chair?
"You complete me!"
Best website ever 4 chair.
You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.
Yo, Leo, are you an interior decorator? Because when you enter a room, it becomes EMPTY!
What do you call a legless table? Nothing.
My Mrs is going to hit the roof when she realizes I've replaced the bed with a trampoline!
What do you call a chair with a hat?
I don't know; the real question is, why was the chair wearing a hat?
How do blind kids get punished?
By moving the furniture around the house.
Why does everyone like couch jokes?
Because they are sofa-nny (so funny)!
Yo mamma so fat, when she tried to sit down the chair ran away.
Yo mama so fat that she broke the chair by sitting on it.
Why did the chair file a restraining order?
The booty wouldn't stop cracking up!
If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.
How do you win a game of musical chairs? You steal the chair!
What did one chair say to the other?
"I'm so bummed out!"