Short jokes
What's the difference between me and my best friends?
At least one of us has a house.
What’s a cow’s favorite piece of furniture?
The cowch (couch).
As a doctor myself, that nurse was very slow, she tested my patience!
Q: What did the little girl say to her leper daddy?
A: "Oops, I got your nose!"
What is Forrest Gump's password?
1forest1
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
My jacket tore a little bit. It's a ripper.
Why can't a little girl fly? She doesn't have the proper motivation.
Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
"Hi, honey, how do you want buns?"
What are twins’ favorite fruit?
Pairs 🍐.
An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?
What time is it when you can smell smoke inside?
Time to get outside!
Emo t-shirt:
"EXISTENCE IS FUTILE."
Where do orphans shop? Home Depot.
An orphan died. No one cared, why? Who is supposed to spread the word? His parents.
What did the math acorn say when it grew up?
"Gee-I'm-a-tree."
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
How does Moses make his tea?
He Brews!!!