I remember asking my mum: "What's a couple?"
She replied, "Two or three."
Which probably explains her collapsed marriage.
Short Jokes
What’s fat, brown, and has no dad?
Ama
I would have loved to ride the Titanic at least once ;)
iykyk
What's the definition of a bastard?
Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!
So, an orphan walked into a store. He gets lost and the store clerk asked, "Do you need help finding your parent?" and the orphan ran out crying.
"Hey, you! Why are you so serious?"
Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
What do you say when the toilet is clogged?
Oh shit!
Roses are red and violets are blue, my best friend is Sue, and she's blue, too.
(meaning sad)
Eshay.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snowbank!
What screams I’m insecure?
I thought happiness started with an “H.” Why does my happiness start with “U”?
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.
What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?
"Put it in my bill."
I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
I tried my best using phone sex online, but the thing about it is the holes cannot fit through.
