Short jokes
The previous joke was by Sebastian Wittrock, but he put Miguel Roberts as the name.
What does a cat say when it's angry?
- Stop stressing meowt!
What do you call a dick playing badminton?
A shuttlecock.
Where does Bin Laden keep his CDs?
In Iraq.
How to stop bullying?
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
Me: (Tim) What's wrong?
Him: Wha...
Me: Are you inTIMidated?
What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?
With a pitchfork.
My gun is like my house, used to be full, now it's empty.
Where did the one legged lady work?
IHOP
Sometimes I just want to toss a flash bang into a room full of epileptic kids.
What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL
Three gay guys walk into a bar.
There is only one stool left, what do they do?
They flip the stool over.
I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.
Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)
Sugar Honey Ice Tea.
I FORGOT MY JOKE!
What did kings say when they were made king?
Allah ail (All hail) [insert name here]!
Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?
That's okay. There is really no point to it.
Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain than he does in his dick, and his dick is 1/4 of a millimeter.