Short jokes

Short jokes

American

American says: "US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai..."

Sardar ji says: "Accha, India me to shaadi.....Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"

Man

Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?

Cow

What do you call a cow that doesn't stop shaking?

A milkshake.

Name

Me: I'm sorry, Aaron.

Aaron: Why?

Me: Your parents couldn't be bothered to look past page one in the big book of baby names.

Nan

What does 1nan + 1nan = 2 smelly fucking dusty dumb fuck nans?

Eye

So I was watching TV, right? Then I f***ing got banged in the eye with either a remote or metal tongs. "WTF?"

Gunshot

Where did Sally go after the gunshot?

6 feet under.

*That is how deep they put the coffin...*

Orphan

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

Pea

What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!

Man

Stephen Hawking was an unfaithful man. He had an affair with Alexa.

Blonde

Did you hear about the blonde that worked at the Dollar Store?

She called for a price check.

Phone

Stephen Hawking tried to charge his phone and unplugged his life support.