Casket Jokes

Cremation, The last chance for a smoking hot body.

Whats the worst thing to say at a funeral? "Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"

Me: *Meets girl, starts to form crush* Me after I get enough courage to talk to her: “Are you a casket lid because I want you on top of me*

“What do you call my friend group?* *Suicide Squad*

I'm sorry and my bad mean the same thing, unless your at a funeral.

Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.

I’m only curious how they closed his casket.

Attended my bosses funeral to pay my respect, on my way out I leant over his casket and whispered lightly.....'Well look whos thinking Outside the box now'.....

What did one casket say to the other casket? It that you coughin'?

(This is a cruel joke, do not say this to anyone it just popped up in my mind)

Roses are Red Violet's are blue yo grandma died, yo dad left you too, now you living with yo old grandma coot. 'oh' let's not forget yo mom left you to, you gon live alone, die alone, with no roses on yo casket too.

Did you hear about the man who died of a Viagra overdose? They couldn't close the casket.

what is the worst thing to do at a funeral the corpse

pass around the roses, their casket full of hoses, crash it, watch it, the water! OH SHIT ITS GONNA BLOW

Luckily his funeral was a closed casket, sorry his car blew a gasket

Setting: Funeral Home

Customer: Yes I was considering what would be the best option for cheap cremation but I feel that's silly to ask.

Funeral Director: Oh! We do have these nice urns over hear at a discounted 75 percent off. Customer: Okay? What's the catch. That's almost 300 dollars off?

Funeral Director: I assure you these are top of the line urns and will keep your loved ones remains secure and dry. Customer: Okay?

Funeral Director: Yep these have only been used once so it's is absolutely worth the purchase.

By: MiniMemorials.com

so my friend died i was at her casket i said ill see you on the other side so i went to the other side of the casket

Everytime I'm come straight home from work you in the bed sleep and back there dead like a vampire in a casket. Then the next thing I noticed you just came back from the dead in no time dummy.