Short jokes
Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?
That's okay. There is really no point to it.
Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.
I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.
What did the pond brother say to his lake sister?
"Oasis!" (Oh, hey sis!)
You wonder and you wonder. Grandma said you better go to bed now. Tell your dad and grandpa, and your dad and your mom.
Sugar Honey Ice Tea.
I FORGOT MY JOKE!
Three gay guys walk into a bar.
There is only one stool left, what do they do?
They flip the stool over.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because he wanted to go to the Shell station.
What's wrong with 89?
You blow me and I owe you one.
What did kings say when they were made king?
Allah ail (All hail) [insert name here]!
Where does Bin Laden keep his CDs?
In Iraq.
How to stop bullying?
Why can't Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
'Cause he'd walk up the stairs!
How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
Me: (Tim) What's wrong?
Him: Wha...
Me: Are you inTIMidated?
What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?
With a pitchfork.
My step bro thought I was single and tried to take me, but I said, "I'm take." And guess what he did? He cried.
Why? Why would you do that?
What did the cow say when it wanted to go to the movies? -- "Let's go to the moovies!"
Where do you go to get the best fish?
A restaurant on the Titanic.
What do you call a toddler lying in the middle of the road? Speed bump.