Short jokes
How many black people does it take to start a protest? -1.
What did the skeleton say before dinner? "Bone appetit." His whole family found that humerus.
I know five fat people, and you're three of them.
Why do priests like kids in wheelchairs? Because they can’t run.
What's green then red all over and goes 100mph?
A frog in a blender.
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"
People are like potatoes.
We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
Whoever kills Hitler goes to heaven. Oh, wait... nevermind...
Damn girl, are you a smoke detector? Because you're super annoying and won't shut up.
I'm made with depression and extra anxiety, then a side of gay and a sprinkle of emo.
When the depressed kid runs out of eyeliner, so he says "fruit ninja" with his wrists.
What's red and green and goes 100 miles per hour? A frog in a blender.
Yo momma so fat, her belt size is E for Equator.
A man walks into a zoo. The only animal was a dog.
It was a shih tzu.
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
Weird Kid: Magazines.
I recently was told by my therapist to stop with the suicide jokes. So I replied with "Don't worry, it will all end soon."
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
What's the difference between a shooter and a bullied autistic kid? It depends on who's shooting.
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
Bully: "I would roast you but my mom told me not to burn trash."
Me: "So that's why you haven't burnt yourself yet." 🤔