Short jokes

Short jokes

Criminal

For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.

Coal

What did the coal say to the charcoal?

You look pretty coal! 🤣

Knife

Q: Why does Pewdiepie prefer knives over guns?

A: Because knives don't have barrels.

Cowboy

Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?

A: All the good guys are hung.

Time

One time Uma Thurman was Poison Ivy; she was weird in that, except for her punny jokes.

Orphan

Dad: Want to go to the park, kid?

Kid: Sure.

Dad: Come on.

Kid: Why are we at the orphanage?

Dad: Go in.

Wheelchair

I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.

Fruit Ninja

I wanted to play Fruit Ninja, but remembered I don’t have a phone. Guess I gotta draw fruit on my arm!

Momma

Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.

Momma

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in them.