Short jokes
What do you call it when a man named Ned works at Panera Bread?
Panera Ned.
I'm on a roll with my jokes, right now!
Your hairline is so bad that they used it as trenches in the World War.
Your hairline is an artificial fact.
For my birthday on September 11th this year, I just want a plane, but delicious, chocolate cake.
"(My beard actually connects.)" "Like the connection you never had with your father."
You're so poor that you can't pay for a public school.
I only have a few friends, like if you relate.
Based on a true story.
Your money, you bully's everything you hate.
If you're pro-life, I hope you get hit by a bus today!
Can I pin your corpse to a tree?
Yo momma's titty milk taste like Captain Crunch.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I don't know, but the Twin Towers do.
Why are Americans so bad at class royals?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?
The owners know that forces come in pears.
Why did the GG Miller say to the loser?
"This is a nice reflection!"
What did the two towers make after they died? The One World Trade Center.
You can only say "Kobe" now when you're playing flight simulator.
Wheelchair soccer is just IRL Rocket League. Change my mind.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!