Short jokes
Yo momma's titty milk taste like Captain Crunch.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I don't know, but the Twin Towers do.
Why are Americans so bad at class royals?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
Why is Newton not allowed to visit local farms?
The owners know that forces come in pears.
Why did the GG Miller say to the loser?
"This is a nice reflection!"
What did the two towers make after they died? The One World Trade Center.
Wheelchair soccer is just IRL Rocket League. Change my mind.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
How did a man know his wife died?
Dishis start piling up.
You're so fat, you have your own gravitational pull.
The dear God created the man.
Then he created woman.
When he then saw what he had done, he took care of tobacco and alcohol.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
Why did the Titanic sink? Because everyone played Simon Says!
When I get jokes. They aren't f****** restarted like you.
My sister.
If your controller ever dies, remember those people that died on the submersible.
Why do they call them a nonce?
Because they go for people who don't have any sense.
My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.
I told her to keep her chins up.
What is it called when you have four white people in the car?
Clear windows.
What's the difference between friends and family?
One is actually real.