Short jokes
I wrote a book called "Endless Love."
It’s about a tennis match between Stevie Wonder and Hellen Keller.
Why shouldn't you make fun of burn victims?
Because they've already been roasted!
People ask me, "Are you an organ donor?"
"Yeah, over my dead body!"
Notice on a shoe repair shop: I’ll heel you, I’ll save your sole, I’ll even gladly dye for you.
The show COPS has been dropped from broadcast,
honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras.
What do alcoholics and gas prices have in common?
They both get really high.
Why do women have two sets of lips?
I kiss both.
What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?
"Do you want the cameras on or off?"
For a golfer, Tiger Woods isn't very good of a driver.
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! 💀💀
Life is like a bag of jellybeans.
Nobody likes the black ones.
What’s something Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger have in common?
Once you fall asleep, you’re fucked.
What's a rapper's favorite DESSERT?
Rhyme-berry pie.
If laughter is contagious, LEO is immune.
What plate goes to Bikini Bottom?
Malaysia Flight 370.
I read the chapter of numbers, but nowhere did I ever see your number.
Damn boy, you must be Nick Cannon because you don’t know when or how to stop.
Why did the rapper carry an UMBRELLA?
Because he heard there was a 50% chance of "Lil Wayne."
Wanna play dolls?
I can be Ken, and you can be the box I come in.
Quote from Seth no.1: "I would have fought back, but she was seven."