Short jokes
Why were ET's eyes so big?
Because he saw the phone bill.
rtuiyg.
We should not stop orphan jokes. They're funny as fuck.
Your mom is so poor, she buys used food.
What do you call Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
The world's first microwaves.
My girlfriend has a huge crush on Jupiter, I mean she fell HARD!
My doctor called me a "psychopath." How dare he?!? He'll pay for this!
Where are virgins usually born?
Virginia.
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
Why did the cheetah always cheetah against the lion?
Because she knew the lion was always lion.
Why are the Twin Towers and after girls kill all boys similar?
There used to be two but now there's one...
I had to share a table recently with a disabled man. When I asked him for the salt and pepper, he had to make two trips.
Why did the koala go to bed?
Because it was leafing.
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
Who is Joe?
You reply back: Who is Candice?
They reply back: Who is Candice?
You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."
When you think about it, Hitler wasn’t a bad person. He killed Hitler.
Why do orphans always get picked on?
They can't run and tell their parents.
I have a lot of eggcellent egg puns, get the yolk... Oh come on, don't be hard-boiled!
I told my friend to watch Naruto. It's been a week since I've seen him. Hope he comes back in one piece.
Where do Sith get their clothes?
At the Darth Maul!