Short jokes
What is a gathering of octopuses called?
Octoposse.
I don't like it when people make jokes about 9/11, because we lost 19 great patriots that day.
A swan, a goose, and a penguin walked into a bar... I ducked.
What do you do if you see an Indian woman getting raped? Nothing, since raping is a normal everyday part of Indian culture.
I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? ๐คฃ
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
Itโs all Depends!
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
Guns don't kill people, black people kill people.
Why did the prostitute lose all her money?
Because she got f*cked.
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
Why did the butt let out a fart?
Answer: To wipe out humanity!
What is an astronaut's favorite letter on a keyboard?
SPACE.
I got a call from NASA. Theyโve reached your hairline.
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
What is one word orphans can't spell?
Family.
What goes pop pop sizzle sizzle?
Two dead babies in an acid bath.
Q: What does Pakistan love to do with India when they go to war?
A: Surrender their 93,000 soldiers.
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!