Short jokes
What are the best kind of fruit for twins? Pears 🍐
What was King Tut's favorite coffee?
De-coffin-ated.
I have a really good construction joke, but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His core i5 Overheated. XD
There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!
I once did an exam on rainbows. I passed with flying colors.
Why was the sheep arrested?
Because he did a "ewe" turn on a motorway.
What do you get when you cross a pedophile and an elementary school? Predator 3.
Why did the cumulonimbus not show up for work?
Because it was on strike.
Someone threw a cup at my eye. I told 911 that I was mugged.
Where does a pianist go on vacation?
The Florida Keys.
I would tell you a joke about a slice of pizza, but it's really... cheesy. I donut think you will come up with a better pun than this.
My hips can't move, but Heineken.
How do you get two deaf people from fighting?
Turn off the lights and walk out.
Why won't my boyfriend eat my pie? His brother made it.
What is the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a Harley Davidson?
The location of the Dirtbag.
What do you call a stoner when horny?
A weed whacker!
Stormtrooper: Hey Palpatine! Luke is Vader's son.
Palpatine: Knew it.
Taja?
Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me.