How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
Short Jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
Where do astronauts 👩🚀 keep their sandwiches 🥪?
In their launch box! 🚀📦😂
My depressed mom looks good hanging from a tree.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
You smell like tap water and cornflakes.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
A clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
Why was Stephen Hawking always bullied?
Because he couldn’t stand up for himself.
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
What's better than 5 babies in one dumpster?
1 baby in 5 dumpsters.
Who is M.J.'s cartoon character?
Muzan Kibutsuji
Hehe
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
"Just killed a woman, feeling good."
- Tommyinnit
Why did Michael Jackson go to the movies? He saw there was minor nudity.
Why did the koala climb the tree?
To get to the other branch. :)
He made it, don't worry!
