Short jokes
Why is it called a building if it's already built?
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Some of the best comedians mimic people. I mimic my shadow.
What did Adam say when he saw Eve?
Answer: "Woman!"
I'm Tall.
Confucius say, man who go through turn table is going to Bangkok.
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
Why didn't the drummer play?
Because he got a percussion.
Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.
Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.
How do you annoy Pinocchio?
Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"
Viagra is a lot like amusement parks...
It's a one hour wait, for a two-minute ride.
I once had clothes that were so unbearably uncomfortable,
but I never realized they suited me.
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
What do you call a skeleton's omelet?
A bonelet.
My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.