Short jokes
How do you make Prince Andrew sad? You tell him you're over 16.
Hey, I just found out my toaster is waterproof! :D
The best way to enjoy Port Arthur is to shoot through--a quote by hilarious comedian Isaac Butterfield.
Orphan: What are you doing tonight?
Me: Your mum... oh wait, you don't have one.
What did the South Tower ask the North Tower?
Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off!
What do snowmen call snowballs?
Children!
Welcome to Arby's, where your babies become our gravy!
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
Why can’t balls move? Because no one is there to voice them around.
Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"
Is your ass jealous of the shit that came out of your fucking mouth?
One day I woke up and went on my phone. Some "pussy" was calling me. I answered it and said, "Hello, pussy?" and a pussy pic showed up.
If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.
A guy went back to his apartment. Five minutes later, he said to the receptionist, "It doesn't fit!" So she gave him a new key.
A retarded kid sees a murderer chopping up his latest victim with a saw. The retarded kid yells, "Seesaw!" because he sees a saw.
Your forehead is so big that you can see the whole world before you do!
What goes up and down and needs two people?
A seesaw.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.