Short jokes

Short jokes

Orphan

  • The orphan wanted to call home sick, but there was no one.

    The orphan went to school to have food, but there was no money in his account.

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    Wheelchair

  • The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."

  • 1
  • Kid

  • I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.

    He never came back the next day, says the local news.

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    Jesus

  • I bought myself the life-sized Jesus painting off of Amazon, and they had 4 nails within the pack. All I needed was 1.

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  • Death

  • What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.

  • 2
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    Bear

  • So here's the joke. A bear walks into a bar and sits down and then....then..........then................................zzzz

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  • Victim

  • Why are 9/11 victims so good at reading?

    Because they can go through 100 stories in 5 minutes.

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    9/11

  • I have a pen, I have an Apple, um, Apple pen.

    The Taliban had a plane, the US had a building boom, 9/11.

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  • Memory

  • A favorite childhood memory was building sandcastles with my grandfather, that is until my mom took the urn away from me.

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