Short jokes
Why do laws forbid hoes from owning stocks in condom makers?
Answer: Insider trading.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ligma.
Ligma who?
Ligma balls.
Nice! Angry Birds really has improved.
A pastor asked his child what his favorite bible verse was... He responded, "Keep watch," because he wanted a watch.
Life would be so much easier if grass was emo.
Because it would cut itself.
What do Afghanistan people love about bombs?
They're black and go off.
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
I AGREE WITH EDP.
"I'm very good in sports."
"In which sports?"
"EA Sports."
What's an Asian's favorite food place?
Answer: Petco
Who is Osama Bin Laden’s secret cousin? Barack Obama or Barack Osama Bin Laden?
Which word is also called for women's prison?
"Pridaughter."
You should always wash your sex toys. That's why priests baptize babies.
I'm so poor I have to put my Big Mac burger on layaway.
Well, a lock and a key were going on vacation, but the key said, "Help me, I'm stuck!" and then the lock said, "I think I am in lock-shary."
Your forehead is so big it blocked my phone service!
What’s the difference between Geico and a wife?
Geico saves you more.
What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?
I don’t have a life.
Why are cancer kids so fly?
Because they got the drip.