Short jokes
What makes a 360 no-scope and JFK's assassination similar?
Both were some of the greatest achievements in history to achieve.
Your mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.
I dare you to smile like a donut. Did you do it?
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
Your smile is so nice that the moon shines off them.
You are so intelligent that parents come running to beg you to be their child!
You're so wonderful that Wonderland booked tickets to meet you!
You're so brilliant and bright that the Sun wears sunglasses when you're near!
You're so awesome that the word 'awesome' demanded its title back!
You're so cool that celebrities take pictures of you.
My friend had one request for me before he committed suicide, and that was to play Van Halen’s “Jump” at his funeral.
If you hit an Indian person on the forehead with a dart, is it considered a bullseye?
How does white people's backyard look like? Cotton field!
I have some black friends who hate it when I say the N-word around them, so I got a pet monkey.
Me: uses the crucifix.
Rush: Ahahahahahahæanananana!
What was the weather forecast when the planes hit the World Trade Center? Partly cloudy with scattered passengers!
How do you get a monkey off the wall?
You jerk him off!
What's the similarities between anonymous and a cow? I think you know...
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.