Short jokes
You should never leave a man hanging.
Unless they are still alive.
You walk into your grandma's room and you see her naked and she says "Come here grandson." What would you do?
What's an alien's favorite computer key?
The space bar!
When is a door not a door?
When it’s ajar!
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
Is necrophilia considered cracking open a cold one?
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
My existence.
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
Which freedom fighter do we say "good morning" every day?
Answer: Subah Chandra Bose.
"Subah" means morning.
What's long, black and full of seamen? A submarine.
Willies.
What did one detective say to the other detective?
"Disguise is lookin' suspicious."
Why couldn't the Japanese man give a high five?
Because Logan Paul left him hanging.
What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?
They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
Why couldn’t anyone see the bird?
Because it was in da skies.
What bird doesn’t need a comb?
Bald eagles.
If 4 birds are sitting on a fence and one gets shot, how many are still on the fence?
None, the rest fly away.
Why do people drink Starbucks? Because it's too hot to handle!