Short jokes
His wife shut off the internet.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
When you see an "Autistic child zone" sign and say, "Oh! That wasn't a dog."
Hungry: Dad, I'm hungry.
Dad: Hi, Hungry, I'm Dad.
Hungry: Why did you name me like this? :/
Is your body from McDonald's, because I'm loving it?
What do you call a no "r"-med T-rex?
A T-ex.
Yaxaas?
What do you call a dictionary on drugs?
High definition or addictionary.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No-eye-deer (no idea).
If you have 20 apples and you ate 2, how many do you have left?
0 because you have 20 and take away 2, you have 0 left.
You know, eBay sucks. I was looking for a lighter, and it gave me 18,906 matches.
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
Your mamma's so fat, the aliens call her their mother ship!
Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.
No, what did you get? Older.
I like my women like I like my diving pool:
Deep and wet.
"SpaStics on aplastic. Add me on ps4 SpaZZagaZZa54."
"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"
Why did the person peel his skin off? Because he wanted to.
What did the 90s rocker Space Engineer in multiplayer Miner yell at the Troll stealing his stuff?
"Hey! give me my Nickelback!"
The wedding was so emotional, even the cake was in tiers.