Short jokes
After watching Star Wars 8, I have to say Snoke was half the man I expected him to be.
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
Where do Sith get their clothes?
At the Darth Maul!
Hahahahahahah I'm dying.
Son: Hi Dad, I'm Son.
Dad: Hi Son, I'm Leaving You.
Years later:
Dad still did not come back.
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
What do Logan Paul, KSI, and the Japanese suicide victim have in common?
Tying.
Let's not make any more Indian jokes. All your jokes are trash. Please stop.
When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"
How do birds pay? With their bills!
Why do mountains contain things? Because their moun-tains.
How does a blind person know when a skydive has finished?
The dog lead went slack.
Why are hill billies so weird? Because their name is Billy.
I remember my grandfather's last words: "Is that loaded?"
Potatoes
Stand? Wait. No.
What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quack head!
My mom must be a duck then...
Sniff a liter of petrol. You'll go back to the dream time at.
What did Bob the police officer say to his chest?
"You're under a vest."
What's a hamburger's favorite color?
Burgundy.