Short jokes
Why do they tell actors to "break a leg"?
Because every play has a cast.
You know what should give up and stay dead?
Fortnite.
"I was lost in the woods yesterday."
"I was in some sticky situation..."
At the back of Abraham Lincoln's mind, next to the bullet hole, he was thinking about how slavery is wrong.
what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back.
"Out of the way, I need to Caterpie."
Reeeeeeeeeeee!
Have you heard of the new book about anti-gravity?
Well, I just can't seem to put it down.
Why don't Jedi like their female relatives?
Because they are Sith-ters.
I could tell you the one about the broken pencil... but it's pointless.
The whole reason he is dead is because he kept hitting "Remind me later" on his Windows Updates.
Suc my dic
Did you hear about the old Italian chef?? Yeah he pasta away.
Then a man walked comprehending to be him. Everyone knew he was an impasta.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
Why did all the numbers laugh at 22? Because it had "tu tu's."
Yes, I'm CUTE.
C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty.
Bender.
59009 flip it backwards on your calculator... it = boobs!
My people are starving. Stop Africa jokes. Not funny >:(
What do you call two bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.