Takeout

Takeout jokes

Misunderstanding

When Kim Jong-un said "nuke the Chinese", he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.

  • 3
  • Memes

    Gas

    Chinese takeout $15.00, gas to get there $1.50. Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes... rice-less!

    Bar

    Poipole walks into a bar and says “poipoipoipoi.”

    The bartender says, “Sorry, but in order to get takeout, you have to know how to speak a foreign language.” Poipole says “Pika!”

    Wheelchair

    To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."

  • 19
  • Wheelchair

    I broke up with my girlfriend, so I stole her wheelchair, and guess who came crawling back.

    Wheelchair

    To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.

  • 30
  • Cardboard box

    I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes.

    The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.