Short jokes
How do you know you broke into a gay man’s house?
They only have a back door.
A fat person with autism is a bit like decent sunscreen... A broad spectrum.
You're like a stormy cloud, because once you go away, it's a nice day.
Explain Bear, girl, you're tripping.
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
What did Kobe say to the helicopter?
"Don't crash!"
Kobe: "Don't crash!"
Helicopter: *Crashes*
How do you call a Chinese emo? Han ing. (Hanging)
How do you blind an Irish woman?
You put a bottle of Scotch in front of her.
What is the definition of confusion?
Three blind lesbians in a fish market.
I'm going to make a city just for people with special needs.
I'll call it Downtown.
What's the difference between a six-year-old and a submarine?
I've never been inside a submarine.
I should probably stop making jokes about bulimia. They just leave a bad taste in my mouth.
What do you call a guy with no body and nose?
No body nose
Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg?
He's all right.
What is Helen Keller's son's name? Hrrrrrrr.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired for having sex with his clients?
He was a great veterinarian.
Siri is so ugly that she needs to go in the dumpster. She's so ugly that she needs to go in the toilet.
What do noodles and women have in common? They both wiggle when you eat them.
How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.